When you know you've been BrownGirled
You’ve been BrownGirled if one of these things happens.
You say something at a professional gathering or a work meeting, no one says anything, and ten minutes later someone says what you said and gets big applause, and no one mentions you.
Or, you talk about how racism hurts you. You talk about feeling invisible. You talk about feeling powerless though your position should give you power. After the meeting ends, older white men come up to you and tell you how they feel the same way, just as powerless as you.
Or, you have gone out for the evening with two white women. They talk a lot. They even talk over you a few times. Then they talk about things you don’t know, didn’t know growing up because you didn’t grow up in America. They talk about tv shows, movies, and pop culture that you don’t know about, and have a great time while you wonder how to not look like a fool, how to step into the conversation. You never do, and also, again, because you speak a little softly, they either don’t hear you, or they don’t acknowledge what you just said. Also, on the drive home, you sit in the back of the big Sports SUV one of them drives, and the other one sits in the front passenger seat. There’s loud music playing so that they can talk to each other and hear each other, but you can neither hear nor get a word in.
Or, a white person comes to your house and sees your collection of Indian music CDs. Some of them are Bollywood. They almost lunge for them and ask to borrow some, because they are ‘really into all kinds of music.’ You are happy to share with them, you are glad they are taking an interest in your culture. A day later they drop off the CDs at your house while on their way home from the grocery store. They tell you, they tried listening, but they didn’t know what they were hearing, they have no context for it.
Yes. You've been BrownGirled.